Halloween Humor

Carved pumpkins, dancing skeletons, smiling ghosts, and witches riding on brooms remind you of your good old days that you often indulged in trick-o-treating your family, friends, and people next-door. All these activities form a significant part of the ghastly festival of Halloween. Falling on October 31, this holiday is commemorated every year primarily in the United States and Canada, and some other English-speaking countries across the world. The unique mix of ancient religious elements and modern-day traditions can be viewed on this day. While Halloween is synonymous to tricks, ghosts, and superstitions, humor and hilarity are always welcomed as they add a spark and enliven the festivities. So, if you are looking for some real side-splitting and hysterical jokes to share with your close ones, a look at the following lines will be highly helpful. Read on.

Halloween Jokes

Chiseling with Fear
Two men were walking home after a Halloween party and decided to take a shortcut through the cemetery just for laughs. Right in the middle of the cemetery, they were startled by a tap-tap-tapping noise coming from the misty
shadows.
Trembling with fear, they found an old man with a hammer and chisel, chipping away at one of the headstones.
"Holy cow, Mister", one of them said after catching his breath. "You scared us half to death -- we thought you were a ghost! What are you doing working here so late at night?"
"My family are such fools!" the old man grumbled. "They misspelled my name and here I have to correct it!"

Halloween Rocky
One Halloween a trick-or-treater came to my door dressed as "Rocky", in boxing gloves and satin shorts. Soon after I gave him some goodies, he returned for more.
"Aren't you the same 'Rocky' who left my doorstep several minutes ago?" I asked.
"Yes", he replied, "but now I'm the sequel. I'll be back three more times tonight, too."

Halloween Afternoon
At 5 p.m. one Halloween afternoon, my dental hygienist realized that she wouldn't make it to the store in time to get snacks for trick-or-treaters. So she took home some free samples from the office supply cabinet.

That night she handed out dozens of toothbrushes, toothpaste, and dental floss.

The next year, although she had bags of chips and popcorn, not one child came knocking at her door.

Changing Sides
A man was going to attend a Halloween party dressed in a costume of the devil. On his way it began to rain, so he darted into a church where a revival meeting was in progress.

At the sight of his devil's costume, people began to scatter through the doors and windows. One lady got her coat sleeve caught on the arm of one of the seats and, as the man came closer, she pleaded, "Satan, I've been a member of this church for 20 years, but I've really been on your side all the time."

Why Pumpkins are Better than Men?
1. Every year you get a brand new crop to choose from.
2. No matter what your mood is, pumpkins are always ready to greet you with a smile.
3. One usually makes a better pie.
4. They are always on the doorstep there waiting for you!
5. If you don't like the way he looks, you just carve up another face.
6. If he starts smelling up your place, you can just throw him out.
7. From the start you know a pumpkin has an empty, mush filled head to begin with.
8. A pumpkin is turned on (lit-up) only when you want him to be.